PrayingWithMyFingers

So yesterday I was pretty bummed about my whole life.  How do I take control without taking control?  Trying to control my life always gets me into trouble but yet when I try to “go with the flow” I end up feeling like I need to be “doing” something.  Surely, there is a happy balance there somewhere but I’m having trouble getting the balance.  But then I think that is the point, no?  Balance in all things instead of rigidity and control always seems to move me toward rigidity.
This …

I don’t feel like talking this morning.  I am discouraged and somewhat depressed.  But since I decided I will talk to You and that having a relationship with You involves reciprocal communication, I guess I have to talk to you even if I don’t feel like it.  I don’t want to talk to anybody today because I feel like a big fat failure.  And I do mean fat.  Last night I indulged in the Nachos and ice cream with chocolate sauce and all the while being very aware that this …

We need to talk.  I suppose you already know that, but it is news to me.  I have been focused for these last several years on listening……not that I’ve done a very good job of that either!  As you know, I stopped talking in 2001 when Ed was dying of lung cancer.  I just didn’t think that anything I might say could have any affect whatsoever with you.  I mean, after all, there was all those people who died in 911 so why did I think that Ed should be …